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  • Writer's pictureYvonne Coleman

How Can I be Better?

Updated: Sep 28, 2019

As women, we tend to want to take on more than what we can handle, and with that comes a big load of stress. Sometimes, it's not the load that we handle, it the amount of emotions that we deal with as well. Often times those same emotions can hinder us in some type of way or form. It can tamper or interfere with who we are, what we do and where we’re going. It can really derail us for progression. We can even choose to not deal with it and live in denial, we don’t want to accept things for what they are, that’s a form of self-deprivation. Self-deprivation, also known as voluntary denial or suppression of one’s own interests or desires. In psychology, therapists in training also learn about the Cognitive Behavior Triangle. The triangle reminds us that our thoughts influence how we feel, and how we feel influences how we act or behave. One will always influence the other, it doesn’t matter which one you change, it will influence the others.

From experience, I've learned that there is a large quantity of women who face internal struggles with self-esteem and self- acceptance. Based on research, many therapists have found that positive affirmations bring forth positive energy daily. Positive affectivity can be defined as the "internal feeling state (affect) that occurs when a goal has been attained, a source of threat has been avoided, or the individual is satisfied with the present. The tendency to experience such states is called positive affectivity."

So why should we avoid negative emotions and replace them with positive emotion; because it is important right? On one hand, negative emotions consist of unpleasant, often disruptive, emotional reaction designed to express a negative effect. Negative emotion is not conducive to progress toward obtaining one's goals.

On the other hand, positive emotions are an emotional reaction designed to express a positive effect, such as happiness when one attains a goal, relief when a danger has been avoided or contentment when one is satisfied with the present. So as a woman, how can we be better versions of ourselves? Plan your day as you would but integrate positive affirmations. Remind yourself to practice mindfulness and let everything you do be done in love.



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